Did you make New Years Resolutions this year? If so, are they starting to fall apart now?
That’s no surprise. Statistics show that around 80% of New Years Resolutions fail. And let’s be real, 2020 was the strangest and most stressful year ever. And now 2021 has also gotten off to a rocky start. People are still dying from this pandemic at record levels, the long-awaited vaccine seems to be stalling, and unemployment is at record levels. We enter a new year with a lot of uncertainty.
Which means it’s probably not the time to push yourself harder to hit hard targets. So let’s forget about stretch goals this year.
That might sound funny coming from me if you read my last blog. After gaining over 20 pounds during the pandemic, I made it my mission to eat healthier and lose weight. With COVID raging here in California and obesity a major risk factor for getting seriously ill from the virus, it seemed the prudent and wise thing to do. After almost two months, I managed to lose 13 pounds. Nothing bad.
However, unlike other times I’ve tried to lose weight, I’m definitely being kinder to myself. Last week, I stayed with my 88-year-old father to help him through cataract surgery, and I gained a couple of those pounds back. I didn’t punish myself for it. Going forward, I’m just focusing on losing five pounds at a time. And if it takes me longer than usual to accomplish that feat, so be it.
Although I encouraged my Facebook followers on my author page to join me on my quest to lose weight and live a healthier life, only one friend took up the challenge. At first, I was surprised. So, I understood.
A time to focus on self-care
Perhaps during these tumultuous times, it’s more about survival than success, however you define that word. Maybe we need to ditch those New Years Resolutions and focus on self-preservation and self-care.
Let’s express our intentions instead of goals this year, with a focus on personal growth instead of achievement.
What is your focus word for 2021?
Have you heard of the recent trend of selecting a “Word of the Year” or “Focus Word”? Supposedly, at the beginning of the year, you choose just one word or phrase that describes what you need most of, what you want to cultivate in your life, or what you want to be your focus for the year.
In the past, when I read about this, it seemed a bit silly to me. But I’ve changed my mind. I’m not talking about words like abundance (unless you’re talking about love), breakthrough, ambition, or achievement. There are so many better and valuable words to choose from.
Mental health may be a priority for you this year. If you are struggling with anxiety and depression during these difficult times, you might choose a word like calm, prayer, strength, resilience, gratitude, tranquility, breathe, heal, strength, survive, or inner peace. Or if you focus on self-care to maintain sanity, you may choose to nurture, witness, release, create, relax, pay attention, simplify, cool, or nurture.
Maybe pick a phrase, like “You’ve got this” or “We’ll get through this” or “This too shall pass.”
If you want to make physical health a priority, you can adopt a word like active, vigor, fit, strong, healthy, mindful eating, or exercise.
How about going for a word like compassion, love, empathy, and kindness? These are great words and qualities to adopt, especially towards those who are fighting this virus in this horrible pandemic, those who are losing loved ones, and those who are suffering from job loss, stress, and depression. After all, focusing on others can help your own well-being. Think about the positive feelings you experienced the last time you comforted or encouraged another person. “Helping others takes the mind and emotions off of oneself, allowing the mind to overcome anxieties and rumination,” said Stephan G. Post, PhD, director of the Center for Medical Humanities, Compassionate Care and Bioethics at the Stony Brook University, in an article for Healthline.
And let’s not forget spiritual words like hope, faith, trust, or believe. Life comes and goes, sometimes causing pain, sadness, difficulties, grievances, and frustration. If you are a spiritual person and have faith, it can give you hope for the future, no matter your current circumstances.
Since this describes me, I choose the word “forward.” As motivational speaker Zig Ziglar said: “If there is hope in the future, there is literally power in the present.”
Because I look to the future with hope and confidence thanks to my faith. Because with God’s help, I know that our ability and infinite capacity to resist and recover is much greater than we think.
I choose “forward” because I look forward to the day when I can hug my family and friends again. I look forward to the time when I can travel to unknown destinations and experience new adventures. Heck, I’m looking forward to the day when I don’t have to dye my hair!
In other words, I really want to keep going.
So what is your focus word for this year? No rules. Think about which focus word will have the biggest impact on your life. Maybe pick five focus words instead of one. In fact, I plan to try to incorporate all of these words into my life this year.
What is your intention for 2021?
