People often equate humility with submission, low self-esteem, and low confidence. Not adequate qualities to say to be a leader or an animator.
However, Jim Kong Kim (President of the World Bank) is a leader who recognizes the value of humility. He says it allows him to seek advice on new personal skills and to solicit feedback on his performance from his subordinates.
Sure, arrogance and arrogance can get us into trouble. An inflated ego, showing off and seeking admiration can create high expectations that one cannot meet. But it is a positive sense of self-respect, confidence, and assertiveness that are not carried too far, really compatible with humility? Can humility be a good thing?
Characteristics of humility
So what do we mean by humility? You can associate humility with embarrassing experiences. I can remember many years ago, on vacation, I woke up alone in my tent. My two sleeping companions were elsewhere. We had been drinking vodka the night before and I didn’t remember going to bed. But I was surprised to see that I must have vomited in the store. I had to eat humble cake when I met my companions.
There appear to be several key characteristics of humility according to June Tangney, a George Mason University psychology professor.
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A precise sense of one’s abilities.
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The willingness to recognize mistakes and gaps in knowledge.
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An openness to advice and new ideas, even if they contradict one’s assumptions.
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Ability to ‘forget’ the self.
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An appreciation of the value of all things.
Humility and inferiority
It can’t be wrong to be able to have an honest and unbiased look at yourself, warts and all. It seems that this does not require a sense of inferiority towards others. The truth about yourself is solid rock, rather than quicksand, on which you can begin to build your character.
In fact, a feeling of inferiority can hinder humility. Psychologist Dr. Julie Exline notes:
“People may need a secure sense of personal worth before they can tolerate an honest assessment of their strengths and weaknesses.“
You don’t need to feel inferior to others to humbly view yourself as a relatively small part in the larger scheme of things, perhaps compared to the universe.
Are you willing to learn from others: your friends, co-workers, family? And can you give credit to what is owed? Those who are humble will not need to put others down in order to feel better about themselves. Can you also admit it when you need help?
Humility and pride
If you are a modest soul, you probably won’t impress people on the first meeting. But they’ll probably be attracted to you more than the kind of proud, authoritarian individual who doesn’t have the humility to admit when he’s wrong about something or whose bragging and bragging will eventually make him lose friends.
Such an individual:
“He puts the merit in good deeds … and believes that all good originates from himself.” (Emanuel Swedenborg, spiritual philosopher)
People like this tend to think they deserve rewards based on what they see as their own worth. However, doesn’t true happiness come from wanting to do what is good and useful without worrying about being well regarded by others or paid?
Swedenborg reports on a vision he experienced. Saw people cutting wood. They continued to do this without tiring. This was his deception.
“It seems to them that they are cutting firewood. This is exactly how it seems to them. I have spoken to them. When they are doing their work and they are asked if they are not tired, they respond that they have not done enough work yet to be able to deserve heaven.” (Emanuel Swedenborg)
He says that these people had been confirmed in the idea that they deserved credit for the good things they had done in life. Consequently, they believed that they could save themselves from unhappiness and suffering only with their own efforts. We are told that because they had led conscientious lives, this erroneous belief would eventually begin to fade and they would stop cutting wood and be cared for.
Humility and awareness of one’s own limitations.
Clearly, we are all forced to deal with life’s problems by making our own decisions and trying to get the most out of things. People who are aware of their own limitations soon realize that, on their own, they can accomplish very little. They are the first to raise their hands and say, sorry, I can’t do this without help. I need ideas and support from colleagues, family, friends. Even the help of a force for good that is beyond my own limitations.
Have you ever had a feeling of surprise and admiration, evoked by an experience that is somehow inexplicable or that exceeds expectations? Perhaps it was something from the mystery of life or a new vision of something familiar. As we remind ourselves of our own limitations, the feeling of wonder can lead us to humility, reverence, and appreciation for things that are greater than ourselves.
Humility of a tree branch
If you know anything about orchards, you know that any wilted limbs of a tree that does not produce fruit need to be cut off. You might as well throw it away and burn it for all the good it does. Branches that are well should also be pruned to produce more fruit. The obvious point is that no branch can bear fruit on its own. It must remain glued to the trunk.
Isn’t it the same with each one of us? I would like to make the suggestion that there is no use trying to live life as if we are not attached to the source of life. There is no use trying to do it alone. The branch must remain connected for the energy and nutrition of the tree to work on the branch.
Isn’t the tree of life the source of our deepest motives and ideas? Some would say that this spiritual source can be recognized as a cosmic love and wisdom that pervades the universe, if only we would recognize and receive its inflow.
