*** Living abroad taught me not to take myself so seriously! NO ego, pride in check, okay, now is the time to get down to business!
Living abroad as an American expat in Morocco taught me a lot about foreign culture, traditions, albeit MOST IMPORTANTLY MORE ABOUT myself, family values, community or lack thereof, that we may be missing in the states . (Perhaps his family is different, though if that is the case, his family is very special and unique, to say the least!)
I really love my family, that can’t be ruled out! One thing I can safely attest to though: It takes two parties to make a family unit dynamic, loving, caring, empathic, and in both agreements having the will and desire to want to stay in touch! I am sorry to reveal that my long distance bills were mine and mine alone! Even receiving email is too much of a hassle for friends and family to chase after you when you’re out of sight. You will soon realize that when you are out of sight you are also out of their thoughts and lives.
Realizing that there is no longer any real or genuine concern or involvement from your family members to want to connect with you is a very humbling and heartbreaking experience.
Remember the old adage: OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND? It rings true when you live abroad and do NOT expect to maintain loving connections with friends and relatives. Although not set in stone, it still rings true more often than not, at least in American family dynamics more than most. If in doubt: do your own research and please contact me with comment or advice, I promise to listen to your findings.
Unless you’re an active-duty military living abroad, where there’s social pressure to communicate with your relatives abroad, family members disconnect from you too quickly.
When there is no purpose, ie exchange of favors, time, money or tasks/mutual exchange, there is really no reason for them to want to keep in touch with you.
You will get tired of sending emails that will be answered days, weeks or months later.
Care packages, you ask? Nonexistent, unless there is peer pressure for active duty military expats or their family members.
DO NOT expect anyone (family, friends, co-workers or close relatives) to show you if you are important enough that ANY OF THEM would want to invest in keeping in touch with you by phone, email or even Skype. . A SKYPE call would have been nice… Enough of that!
*** Living in another country, not knowing the languages, or even the most widely used foreign languages, dialects or vernacular is really a way < (menos que) espectacular de existir. POR QUÉ (?) Porque a todos nos gusta y necesitamos conectarnos con otras personas y cuando los parientes no están cerca, o personas, lugares y terrenos conocidos. Es MÁS QUE > It is important that we try or should try to acclimate to the people and their languages in our new environment. Quite a humiliating experience, indeed… (sad face, look of introspection, and finally smiling in retrospect)!
I really admire expats who come to live in the United States and really do a great job of immersing themselves and assimilating into American culture. Expats ARE NOW living and working in more foreign environments than at any time before. Why do you ask. Easy. Having experienced life abroad for almost three years in a row, I learned not to take myself too seriously. With no defense to be able to clearly express my point of view, get my thoughts across, have my thoughts understood, or be able to respond and respond to even the most basic or respond to the general population, it was just mind-bogglingly frustrating and extremely difficult, humiliating and exhausting.
We all like and need to connect with other people and when family members are not around, or familiar people, places and grounds, we tend to isolate ourselves and feel sad and lonely. It is MORE THAN (>) important that we try or acclimate to new people and their languages in our new environment. There is a feeling of sadness that can be avoided if we are open to making new connections with new people.
Try it sometime. Go to another country and try to present your CV or rather, “Curriculum Vitae, with your photo and age on the CV and ask for a job interview in a language that is not familiar to you… I can’t, or can you?
I was able to make friends with a young woman at the bakery whose sister-in-law was also American and she was very helpful. She was able to translate a lot and also taught me to read simple works in Arabic, order beef, chicken and vegetables at the supermarket.
I was also able to meet Moroccans who had previously lived in the US, who were kind enough to help me talk to taxi drivers. I was able to make friends with the director of an English school, who in turn hired me on the spot. The schools I taught had English speaking teachers, although they did not have English speaking owners…Fortunately for me, I am friendly, I was able to make many friends who helped me get a job as an English student. second language school teacher!
LIVE! I came to speak English all day, and it was even a requirement for students in my classrooms, although it was not a strict rule that was always obeyed. Oh well, at least I had a job speaking my own language. I took 10 weeks of French, though I had to rush back to the States for a family crisis and haven’t been back since. Looking back, I feel honored and blessed to have been immersed in such an insightful and insightful expat experience.
I was fortunate to base my ability to adapt to my daily adventures and experiences as a positive choice and life-changing experience.
Humility is highly underrated! She had to be humble, calm, attentive and empathic. AT THE BEGINNING, she lived as a child who was learning primary words and basic language skills. I had to teach myself to be able to communicate when shopping, asking for directions, or when I was home alone. Some of the simpler tasks were cause for anxiety. The long, annoying sound coming from the wall, as the doorman called someone to come into the building, sometimes even wanting to see me or my family. Or when the phone rang or you did something that was perceived as a normal event of daily life. Sometimes the simple act of paying utility bills was both disconcerting and humiliating. Learning not to take yourself too seriously and to work with what you have is far more important and meaningful than holding on to pride, ego, or useless language skills when they are inappropriate or irrelevant to your condition in life.
**** I enjoy learning from you and others continually offering me knowledge!~
