Since having my son four years ago, the number of days I’ve spent climbing each year has dropped dramatically, from over 100 days at one point to zero. Climbing has always been one of my favorite things to do with my husband, but these days we’ve replaced playdates and picnics in the park with mountain adventures. It’s not a bad change, but still, I’ve missed climbing. Living in New York City and working a demanding job made me appreciate all that it has to offer: the beauty, the companionship, the physical exertion, the mental challenge, even the fear. Raising my son, I looked forward to the time when I could introduce him to the cliffs, once he was old enough.
The question then became: “How old is enough to climb?” We’ve taken our son, Mason, to the indoor gym many times, but it wasn’t until we saw him clamoring to climb the “mountains” in the park near our home, the rocks in Central Park where visitors often picnic, that he felt that was ready.
So, on a bright sunny day in early fall, we rented a car, got the gear out of the closet, packed up, and after a quick stop at Zabar’s to pick up some lunch supplies, we headed upstate to the mountains. Shawangunk, known as “the Gunks”. Our first pre-climb trip with our son was fun, but noticeably different from the pre-climb trips my husband and I had done before. Instead of talking about routes to consider and plans to climb as much as possible, we sing and talk about the various trucks we pass on the road.
Getting to New Paltz was exciting. A quick stop at the climbing shop was like visiting an old friend. By the time we got to the trailhead, it was early afternoon, a long way from the alpine trailheads we’ve aimed for in the past, although we rarely made it. My husband and I, back at our favorite cliff, now with our son, were ready to begin our adventure. We thought a lot about how to give Mason a sense of ownership and accomplishment in our day and the first thing we did was ask him to pack his own package. We let him pick out a few things he wanted to wear and we included a group outfit so he could contribute.
Wow, he looked cute going down the trail with his little backpack!
We had a couple of routes on our list to check out, but it quickly became clear that our first option wouldn’t work. A climb called Three Pines was as smooth as we remembered, but the beginning had a sequence of sections that were too big for a little boy who was barely over three feet tall. We decide to head down the cliff, soon dropping our packs at the base of a corner we rarely climb. The route was steep but full of dams, perfect.
There is a moment at the start of any climb when the mood changes. The drive and hike can be casual and chatty, but then it’s time to get on the rock and the climb begins. We fixed up the gear and my husband, David, started up the cliff to belay. After he reached the top and dropped anchor, I tied the rope to Mason’s harness, strapped myself in a few feet below him, and headed up. With my husband’s safety carefully positioned within sight of the cliff and me a few feet below him, Mason began to climb. He hesitated, a little scared, and resisted. For a moment, I wondered if Mason, my shy and cautious boy, would have the courage to continue. But with some encouragement, he got over his fear and made the first move on his. Then another…and another, growing more confident as he learned to scan the rock and find the best footholds for his hands and feet. Before he knew it, we were halfway up the cliff and I hurried after him. By the time he got to the crucial move (the most difficult move on the route), he had a smile on his face. We made the meeting between hugs and joy. Mason couldn’t have been happy. At the top of the cliff, we settled down to enjoy a picnic on top of the world. It was a brilliant moment and the proud grin from ear to ear on my quiet boy’s face was unforgettable.
After our leisurely lunch, we had one last challenge. As climbers always remind each other, the climb is only half done when you reach the top. After double-checking the anchor, I tied Mason and myself to the rope and headed back down the cliff. The first step is the hardest as you trust your anchor and jump off the edge of the cliff. Mason and I held hands as we leaned back on the rope. Once the rope had our weight, it was easy. We descend, taking our time to enjoy the feeling of complete safety on the vertical face of the mountain. At the bottom, we celebrated again, and then it was time to pack up the gear and head home.
Walking the mile or so back to the car is always a nice end to the day: walking past other climbers and hikers, exchanging short stories about the day’s climbs, and chatting with old friends. Our little one is shy. He finds it hard to meet strangers and is even reluctant to say “hello” to the guys who work in our building. But on that day, perhaps buoyed by the confidence gained from climbing his first mountain or the feeling of affinity with his fellow climbers, or maybe just the pride of carrying his cool backpack with a couple of carabiners dangling from the straps, he was there. with us, smiling and joking with the people we meet. It was a great moment.
Since this first trip we have climbed many times, both at the indoor gym near us and outdoors at Gunks, and Mason has enthusiastically embraced his new identity as a climber. When we’re at the park near our house, Mason brings his little rope and gear and strategically plots the route to the top of whatever “mountain” he’s climbing, no matter how big or small. And while that first trip started as a way to introduce our son to a sport we love, we’ve since seen the other benefits climbing has brought him. Climbing has given Mason a new sense of confidence, the confidence that comes from overcoming fear of the unknown, of failure, of taking risks, and pushing yourself to try something new and then succeed. He has also given him a greater source of resilience that has spilled over into other areas of his life: working on hard things, overcoming small failures, and enjoying the challenge. For a shy child like Mason, these benefits have been unexpectedly significant and rewarding. At school, his teachers have seen him come out of his shell and become a more social and vocal member of his class. Although this is due to more than just climbing, I can’t help but believe that the confidence he has gained through climbing has played a part. As I think of our next outdoor adventure, this time traveling to Colorado, one of our favorite places in the world, I think of my son’s proud smile, standing with my husband on top of the tallest mountain in the world. world. that day.
